To be Loved
by Shinichi's Lover
Summary: Rukia had the worst moments 2 months before her death. An abusive father, HIV, prostituting, and an evil crush, Kurosaki Ichigo. Few people did care about her, but it wasn’t enough. She wants only Ichigo, although she knew he will never love her back.
1. Prologue::

**Author's IMPORTANT Note**: First and foremost, this fic is originally belonged to my other fic, also titled To Be Loved, which I published at Soompi(dot)com using the name SarahChan. At there, I used Kim Jonghyun from SHINee and Seohyun from So Nyeo Shi Dae. They're Koreans. For this fic, I changed their name to Kurosaki Ichigo and Kuchiki Rukia. Hey, of course I can do that, it's my fic in the first place, right? Thus, to avoid accusation, I put note at my fic in Soompi that I also published the same fic but with different characters here. You can check it out to confirm it =) Anyway, of course they'll not be 100% similar, since I have to change some part to make it more towards Bleach-like. And this fic is way more depressing and tragic than the other one. It's kinda hard to replace the characters to match with original characters' personalities though (Byakuya character is the hardest!!) But one thing that I'm sure is, I won't change the ending :p (but I haven't finished updating the other story yet) tee hee

**SUMMARY**: Kuchiki Rukia had the worst moments 2 months before her death. An abusive father, HIV, prostituting, death of her god brother, and an evil Kurosaki Ichigo, who appeared to be her crush. Few people did care about her, but it wasn't enough. She wants Ichigo, only Ichigo, although she knew he will never love her back.

**Title:** To Be Loved

**By: **Shinichi's Lover// SarahChan (at Soompi)

**Genre: **Hurt/Comfort, Tragedy, Romance, Angst

**Pairing(s): [major]** Ichigo x Rukia, Byakuya x Hisana, Kaien x Miyako

**[Slight]** Renji x Rukia, Ichigo x Inoue, Ishida x Inoue

* * *

Her mother died when she was 5, leaving Rukia and her sister with an abusive, violent father

Her sister drowned herself in the sea 2 years after that because she couldn't stand it, however the body could not be found

Every morning; being bullied by Ichigo and Inoue at school

Every evening; being physically abused by a cruel dad

Every night; being forced to 'serve' guys at the nightclub

HIV positive, too bad she had to suffer it

Kuchiki Rukia couldn't stand the dreadful, miserable life anymore

She asked for nothing, nothing but…

to be loved

Little did she knows the thing that she asked for only brings her more pain and suffer

* * *

Please review and tell me your opinion =)


	2. Back to school::

The shimmering clouds sheltered my frail body from the scorching eye of the heaven. A gust of wind blew my shoulder-length, smooth and silky hair, leaving it frizzy and poofy. I swung my long legs while pushing my hair back behind my ear. It was very refreshing, sitting at the edge on the hospital rooftop, where the sound of honking cars could barely be heard. However, staring at the dimmed sky and hearing the lonely chirp of a bird soaring by, I sighed in dismay.

As the years passed by, I've waited for a miracle to illuminate my life, but miracle was left a miracle, and hope was just, well… hope. Eventually death shall reside in me because my disease is incurable. I let my thoughts engulfed me as I closed my misty eyes gradually... I'll be going home soon, which means I have to stay with my cruel dad like before. Plus, if I'm going home, that means I have to go to school.

School… I missed my old friends…not. For some reasons I don't really like them. They always picked on me, despised and talked about bad things behind me. My only friend was Hinamori, but she left me, alone and unaccompanied after I told her that I have HIV. Since then, I refrained myself from making friends with anyone. Because sooner or later they'll leave me, or I'll _leave_ them, so what's the use of having friends?

* * *

"Otou-san I'm home." I heard my voice echoed through the empty front room. Realizing he wasn't home yet, I threw myself on my small, cozy bed. I missed my room so much. Perhaps because I rarely sleep there, usually my dad reserves a small room in the pub for my customers. I stood up and proceeded to the kitchen to make some food as my tummy was already grumbling. I made lasagna and peel some orange to make juice for myself.

After filling my empty-stomach, I dozed off since there was nothing for me to do. But it was not long; I could hear some noisy sound as I was half-asleep. Anxiously, I flicked my eyes open to see my dad was murmuring something while holding a green glass bottle of wine in his rough hand.

"So you're home huh?" He finished his wine and grinned joyfully to me. He continued, "Hey bitch, you must work tomorrow, almost all of my money has gone."

"No, I don't want to be a prostitute anymore!" I pushed myself up into a sitting position; I gulped in worriedness when I saw his legs were moving leisurely towards me.

"YOU WILL WORK THERE UNTIL I DIE! DON'T YOU BOTHER REFUSE MY ORDER!!" He said as he smashed the empty glass bottle that he held earlier on my feeble body. I shut my eyes tightly as I feel the pieces of the broken glass went through my bleeding skin, making me groaned in pain.

"Otou-san, please stop it." I begged him. But it was useless, he didn't stop, he kept smashing me with the bottle until it had fully broken, after that he left me unaided. I sobbed as I embrace my bleeding shoulder tightly. That silent night, I slept with tears filling my droopy eyes. _Kaien-dono..._

* * *

The next morning--

I was standing in front of my classroom, doubtful and unsure whether I should enter. But before I could decide on anything, Sado Yasutora rushed into the class, pushing me along with his wide shoulder. I wanted to whine, but Mrs. Unohana showed up at the front door, making all of the students went to their seats. I remained where I was because I need to hand her the hospital's letter. Mrs. Unohana just smiled after she read the white, thin letter. Of course doctor didn't write that I have HIV, that letter was just a fake so that I could go to school like other teenagers.

"Let's welcome our Rukia. She had stayed in hospital for two months because of operation for intestinal tumor, but now she's back. Rukia, you may sit now. Don't forget to copy notes that you have missed while you were absent."

Slowly, I nodded. I took my step properly and kept lowering my head while walking. Right after I sat on my spot, I lifted my head. All I could see were girls gossiping with each other and some guys made disgusting faces on me.

I struggled to pay my attention to Mrs. Unohana, but I could see eyes everywhere, staring intensely at me. I tried to ignore them, but suddenly Inoue Orihime shooed Ishida Uryuu which was located beside me and she took his place. She waved her orange hair cheekily and straightened her bangs which cover her medium-sized forehead.

"So you're back huh? I 'miss' you like crazy, you know that?" Shit, I knew it. Inoue would never leave me alone since last year. She was the last person that I want to meet on earth, after my dad of course. I wished that I could stand up and slapped her, but I couldn't. I was too weak. Besides, I'll be dead if I slap her without good reason, she's way too dangerous. So I just ignored her, but she kept rambling about how hot and sexy her boyfriend is which made me want to puke. Even though deep inside my lonely heart, I envied her a little.

* * *

Seven hours seemed to pass swiftly that day. Without realizing, it was the time to go home. I packed my books inside my small, tiny bag. Suddenly I coughed about more than 5 times. Despite the fact that blood spit out of my mouth whenever I cough, I couldn't let others see those blood. Hurriedly, I went inside the girl's restroom and cleaned myself. Nevertheless, my lips was always bleeding no matter how many times I wiped it, it was the effect from always being slapped by my dad. Sometimes he even used his leather boot to slap my face.

I went to the door to get out of the restroom, crap. Someone locked me from outside. Why do I have to face this situation? This is one of the reasons why I didn't want to go to school, being bullied is part of my life from 8am to 3pm. From 3pm to 10pm is abusive time from my dad. Midnight is the time where I work as a prostitute. Nobody loves me, nobody cares about me, the last time I felt happiness was during my 5th birthday, a day before my mother died. Subsequently, the word happiness vanished from my life's dictionary.

Using my full energy, I smashed the door using my shoulder. I bit my lower lip as I tried to ignore the pain that I had from last night. As soon as I escaped, I rushed to the end of the hallway. After descending downstairs, I bumped into someone that made me fell hard on the ground along with a sound of a smashing vase.

It was Kurosaki Ichigo, the best student and best singer in this school. Not to mention, whenever he sings with his beloved Inoue on the school's radio, my heart melts. I adored his beautiful voice so much. Oh wait, what was I thinking? His father owned several high-class hotels around the world and he went to school by luxurious limousine. Urgh, rich guys are hard to tolerate, especially after the expensive vase that he held earlier fell into pieces.

"Look what you've done! You broke a $50 000 vase!" He shouted.

"I'm… I'm sorry, I didn't see it coming…"

"What do you mean you didn't see? Pay this back!" He was scowling, I kept my sight on the floor, afraid to see his angry face.

"I… I don't have money." It was true. I got lots of money from my customers actually, but my dad took all of them from me. He didn't let me take care of my own money because he worried that I'll spend it to something worthless. Wait, scratch that out. He's a gold-digger father who used his own daughter as his money resources.

All of a sudden, Inoue appeared. Her stunning brown eyes widened when she saw pieces of broken vase on the floor.

"KUROSAKI-KUN WHAT HAPPENED??!"

"This idiot girl bumped into me just now and broke this vase." Huh? Wait, that was not 100% true-

"HOW COULD YOU!!" I could feel a girl's hand landed on my cheek. Ouch. It hurts. However, I've used to it. I've tasted worse, a single slap; especially from a girl was nothing for me.

"You're going to pay for this!" God, no. Please no. I couldn't stand being bullied by her anymore. Three months ago she forced me to steal exam's paper so that she knew what question will turn out. I was the one who finished her schoolwork and did her assignments for the whole last year. She even put prank on me and threatened that she'll tell her father if I didn't do what she asked me to.

If her father is a farmer, I won't bother to follow her order. But she's the only princess to Mr. Inoue Izumi, the school's principal. Everything that she wants will be fulfilled quickly from her father, which means I have no choice but to obey her evil orders.

"Lick this." Inoue showed her shoes to me while my body was still on the floor. I tried to ignore her, but swiftly she kicked my head without a mercy.

"DO IT NOW!! OR YOU WANT ME TO TELL MY DAD THAT YOU'VE BROKEN HIS FAVORITE VASE???!!" I tried to gain sympathy by turning my gaze at Ichigo. Unexpectedly, he lifted his left leg and showed his shoe to me while staring at me in a very pathetic way.

"Lick my shoes too, after that we'll let you go."

* * *

Please review and tell me your opinion =)

A/N: my grammar isn't great, sorry for the mixed-ups tenses. English is my 2nd language after all. Please don't mock me =3


	3. Unlucky day::

Sorry for the late update, I had a month vacation, driving license class and stuff. Hee…

_

* * *

I tried to gain sympathy by turning my gaze at Ichigo. Unexpectedly, he lifted his left leg and showed his shoe to me while staring at me in a very pathetic way._

_"Lick my shoes too, after that we'll let you go."_

**CHAPTER 02**_  
_

"I refuse."

"WHAT??!" I gulped, swallowing my bitter saliva grazed against my dried throat when I heard Inoue shouted furiously at me.

"Relax dear, I'll take care of her," Ichigo sat on his knee in front of me, simpering. He took out his right hand and stroked my messy hair lightly with his long fingers. Again, I gulped. Something dark had already put its cold fingers on the back of my neck. His sudden behavior made my heart beat faster, and my stomach felt queasy. I knew there was something odd behind his sudden manner. After a couple of seconds, an evil smile appeared on his cold face, followed by my hair was being pulled by him strongly. "Listen this, idiot. Do you want to stay in this school?"

I knew it.

I knew that he would act like that.

Being brave, I remained motionless. But he pulled my hair stronger and repeated his words sternly. "DO YOU WANT TO STAY IN THIS SCHOOL?!" Finally, I nodded. "Good, then do as what we asked." he let go of my hair, hard, causing my head to hit the floor. It was hurt, but I could do nothing. Nothing. I was helpless. Almost every student had returned home. No one could save me. Slowly, unwillingly, I licked Inoue's shoes. I could see my own tears fell carelessly onto her shoe's surface. I was crying, why am I so weak?

"Great job old hag. Wow, my shoes are shiny! Now, clean his shoes," before I moved my head, I took a glance at Ichigo again, he was still staring 'pitifully' at me. I closed my eyes tightly and forced myself to follow their orders. "This is fun Inoue. It had been awhile since I've seen such a stupid brainless girl like her. How pathetic!"

"Orihime, Ichigo. What are you doing there?" I turned around and saw Inoue's father, Mr. Inoue Gotou was standing at the end of the hallway. Suddenly, I felt a pair of warm arms was holding my shoulders, lifting my body up. It was Ichigo; he tapped my school uniform, acting as if he was cleaning dirt on it. However, it was not a normal tap, it was a lot harder. He was hitting me.

"Nothing Mr. Inoue, an old school's vase broken when this girl bumped into me but I'm glad she's fine," he explained, but he fixed his wicked eyes on mine and held me closer to him. So it was just an old vase? They lied, they said it was Mr. Inoue's favorite vase. Why was I so stupid for falling into their trick?

"You alright?" I could see fake warm smile carved on his devilish lips, acting as if he concerned. "Mr. Inoue, they forced me to lick –"

"Gosh the pieces went into your skin! I have to bring you to the clinic, hold on, okay?" Out of sudden he lifted me up in bridal style and we left that place before I could even finish my words. Inoue was left behind; perhaps she went straight home with her dad. However, I was still in Ichigo's arms, wondering where he would bring me to.

"Can you somehow… put me down?" I said as I loosened my arms around his neck. He stopped walking and stared coldly at me, "Shut up. Do you think you deserve talking to me? I'm Kurosaki Isshin's son. One of the billionaires in Japan, who do you think you are?"

"I…"

"Stop it. Next time, watch your mouth! If you dare telling the truth to the principal, there will be no mercy for you." I stayed silent as I couldn't fight his words. I turned my gaze to my right shoulder, where his hand was located. It was… soft, his hand was so soft. No one had ever carried me in bridal style before. That was the first time. I couldn't help but felt a little ball of excitement swirled up from the pit of my stomach to the center of my thumping heart.

"Geez, I never thought that there's a human who's heavier than a pig in this world."

"..." I clenched my fist tightly, if I have the courage, I would punch him any moment. But I don't think my fist will work on him, I'm just a girl after all.

"Just put me down." I spoke coldly, sounded like demanding. But the truth was, I was holding my tears.

"Yeah yeah yeah… I'll put you down. Besides, I can't stand holding a pig for too long." I wanted to protest but suddenly I felt his grip loosened. I thought I would fall onto a ground, but I was wrong.

I fell into a pond behind the school's area.

* * *

"Have a nice day." he smirked while waving goodbye to me. I sighed heavily as I climbed up the ground, my uniform was damp. My bag, my books, all were damp and wet. First day of school after 2 months being in hospital was totally disappointing. Being locked in the girls' restroom, being kicked at head, fell into a pond. Why can't I have happiness? I badly want to feel happiness again before I die. Will I?

I went home straight away by foot. Some of naughty kids along the streets laughed their ass off at my wet uniform. I just ignored them, as usual. Luckily it fully dried when I reached home. I locked my bedroom and switched on the lamp. Out of sudden, someone caught my hand and pulled me into a hug.

"Why didn't you tell me that you've been discharged from the hospital? I miss you, you know that?" he broke the hug and caressed my cheeks softly with his rough hand; he had always made me feel as relaxed as this moment.

"Sorry Kaien-dono, I was too tired last night. Where's Miyako-neesan? Did she give birth yet?" all of a sudden his bright, happy face turned as gloomy as the color of the cloudy sky. "Not yet, she's at home, resting…" he closed his eyes gradually. "I feel guilty Rukia, she had become too sick. If only I didn't marry her…"

"Kaien-dono, it's not your fault. You're going to be a father soon, so cheer up okay?" my eyes drifted to his that looked lost, sad, and even frantic a bit. Kaien's physical appearance changed slightly since the last time I saw him. He had become thinner and somehow I could see his bone structure on his arms. He looked like an alive skeleton. I tapped his shoulder, but stopped when I heard a slow sobbing sound. Was he crying?

"Rukia… promise me one thing, can you?" I bit my lower lip, oh God. Was it?

"Please, take care of Miyako for me." I shook my head. "D-Don't… Don't tell me..."

"Yea. Doctor said I don't even have one month left." My heart began to feel like a rock inside my chest, I fell automatically against the wall, burst into tears. "Don't leave us." I spoke in grief, trying to hold the tears but failed. "I'm sorry. I didn't receive any treatment since I was 15. I think I'm lucky enough surviving HIV for 11 years."

"But what about Miyako-neesan? What about your future child? What about me?! Who's going to save me whenever my dad is home??!" even at sixteen, I needed to be within the walls of his security. He and Miyako-neesan were my fortress. No one could harm me when I was with them. But in the future, who will save me?

"Sorry Rukia. I hope I can be your brother for much longer, I'm sorry. Thanks for treating me as your brother," he spread his arms and hugged me. I cried even louder. I met Kaien 3 years ago; it was raining cats and dogs along with thunderstorms at that moment. I ran from my house to escape from my cruel dad and accidentally bumped into him on the street.

Somehow we bonded fast and he offered me to substitute his fiancé's job at a night club as a bartender. That was the first time I met Miyako-neesan. She was five feet seven and always stood up with confidence, regal. Anyone who glanced her way stared at her for a few moments longer as if he or she was hypnotized by her beauty. Kaien was included.

I accepted his offer because I need money to escape from my dad and live alone by myself with the money I collected. However, my dad found the money and even forced me to become a prostitute there. He took all of the money I gained just for his own good. I was planning to quit but Mr. Sousuke won't let me since his son had a big interest towards me. So I was stuck. My whole life is stuck right now. I need freedom badly. Why can't I have freedom for just one or two months before I die? I know I'm selfish, but I don't think it's wrong to be selfish, because I'm going to leave everyone soon. _Soon_.

"Then, who's going to take care of Miyako-neesan after I'm gone? I don't have much time either," I said slowly, pronouncing each syllable with deliberateness. "What do you mean?" he widened his dark blue eyes; I could tell that he was shocked by my words. "I'm dying Kaien-dono, I'm dying. Doctor let me out because he wants me to live to the fullest despite that I'll die sooner or later." he was speechless. His mouth was moving but the voice didn't come out. I hugged him even tighter.

Suddenly the door burst open and Mr. Souseke's son, Grimmjow came in. He brought his gangs with him.

"Kaien, don't bother interfere. She's mine tonight." the turquoise haired guy, Grimmjow said arrogantly while putting both his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket. "Oh really? Who gave you the permission huh?" Kaien raised his black eyebrow.

"Her dad, of course." Grimmjow smirked evilly. "Rukia, I'll take care of them. You better run." Kaien said, his voice dripping with impatience and worriedness.

"But –"

"RUN!!"

As fast as I could, I forced my legs to run. Grimmjow's gangs were already lost from my sight. I wandered aimlessly on the street, wondering where I should go. Suddenly, the sound of honking car near me knocked my mind. I turned my sight to the left, a shiny red Lamborghini was coming on my way. I could not make it, the car was too near. And it hit me.

The last thing I remembered was I felt my body flew far from my previous spot. My head hurt, my vision blurred with tears. I tried to stand up, asking for help but everything went blank.

* * *

Renji's POV

I quickened my pace as I strolled down the dark, empty streets hoping that I would reach home soon. Kira sure going to kill me if he knew that I skipped tuition because I helped Rangiku to finish her homework earlier.

I stopped on my tracks when I felt something squishy under my feet, as if I was stepping over something. I lifted my legs abruptly and took a good look under my shoes. Gosh! I stepped over a human. Most important thing is, its, or rather, she's, a girl. I don't think a girl is braved enough to sleep on the streets like this on this late hour.

"Hey, are you okay?" I turned her body to see how her condition was. I swore I could see blood stain on her uniform dress. I quickly came back to my senses. I checked her pulse on her wrist, and fortunately, she was still alive. Without wasting any time, I carried her on my back and brought her to my house.

I tip-toed silently after closing the door gently. Kira wasn't home yet, '_Great,_' I thought. I laid her on the mattress carefully, hoping that I won't wake her up. Her face looks calm yet sad, not to mention there were blood flowing from her forehead.

I carefully traced her face with my fingers. Her high jawbone, her cherry lips fits on her pretty face perfectly. She was much more beautiful after I wiped her blood and mend her wounds. Anyways, she was still unconscious even after I finished changing her bloody dress. I am no pervert, I only do that out of concern.

"Sleep tight little angel." I kissed her forehead and laid myself on the floor at the corner of my room.

* * *

ahh that's it. Renji's a good guy, ne? please tell me what's in your mind. thank you =)


	4. Worst partner::

Late update because my brother changed the hard drive. Old hard drive contain this fic =]

In case you forgot, the last scene of previous chapter was Rukia got hit by a car when she was trying to escape from Grimmjow.

* * *

**CHAPTER 03**_  
_

I opened my eyes slowly but remained motionless. It was not the huge cosy bed where I used to lie on every night after served several guys at night club, but it was a very comfortable medium-sized bed with one soft pillow and warm mattress covering my injured body. I blinked a few times before I slowly pushed myself up into sitting position. The effect from being hit by Lamborghini was still there on my body.

I widened my eyes when I saw an unknown guy was sleeping at the corner of the room._ Is he the one who saved me?_ I walked leisurely towards him, kneeled down and tried to observe his face. He had sharp nose and thin lips, plus, he has tattoo on his forehead. I rarely see guys who have tattoo on their face. As much as I wanted to thank him, I must leave. I needed to know how Kaien's condition was.

"Thank you." I whispered into his ear, and left the house eagerly.

* * *

I observed my watch carefully under the dimmed moonlight, it was 6:05am. No wonder the street was so calm. After about 15 minutes walking, I finally reached Kaien's house. I knocked several times and Miyako-neesan appeared at the front door.

"Miyako-san!" I hugged her tightly, but I tried to keep a space between us because I didn't want to hurt the baby in her tummy. I could see her face was beyond pale, she looked like a zombie. I didn't mean to sound rude, but it was indeed the truth. I guess that was why Kaien said he felt guilty.

"Rukia, where have you been?"

"Hospital, but now I'm home." I smiled. "How is Kaien-dono? Is he alright?"

"Come in, I'm treating him." without hesitate, I came in and approached Kaien quickly. "Kaien-dono, how are you? Are you alright?" I reached for his hand and held it tightly, guiltiness filled my heart as he didn't respond to my question. "It was all my fault, if only –"

"It is not your fault, Rukia. Please do not think that it is your fault. Kaien-san will recover soon so why don't you go home? You need to rest too," she smiled warmly at me. "Alright Miyako-san, take care. I hope you'll get cute baby. I'll visit you again this evening."

"Thanks." I took my leave after I hugged her. Because our houses were just a stone's throw away, it took me about less than five minutes to arrive home. I changed to school uniform and kept the cloth I was wearing in my cupboard. I should return the cloth to the guy who saved me. How can I forget about that? My another school uniform was still in his house.

But perhaps later, I need to go to school first. Luckily my wound seemed to be healing slowly, I really think I should rest, but I preferred to go to school. Being in school is a lot safer than being home with my dad.

* * *

As I stepped into the class, my jaw dropped. How could I not realise that my seat was located behind Kurosaki Ichigo's seat? I totally forgot that he studied in the same class as me starting this year. But hey, Inoue's seat was located beside him. What a 'coincidence'!

"So this chick didn't drown yesterday, how lucky." _it was only a pond, fool. Of course I won't drown._ But I remained quiet, I'm not strong enough to counter his words.

Hours passed. Or is it minutes? Mr. Komamura was teaching, but I didn't pay my attention to him. My gaze fell on the person who sat in front of me, Kurosaki Ichigo. I couldn't help looking at him from time to time and even listening to him talking with other students, even Inoue. The truth was, he was indeed one of the most good-looking boys in this school, and that was the reason why I keep gazing at his apparent even just watching at a distance without talking to him since I entered high school. But after knowing his true colours yesterday, let's just forget about what I had mentioned earlier. He _was_ my crush, but now not anymore. Or so I think...

"Okay that's it. Don't forget to bring your Mathematics report tomorrow." Mr. Komamura went out of the class and most of the students were screaming happily because it was our lunch break. "Hey… why did you leave?" I looked up, _who is this guy? _"You are…?"

"I'm Abarai Renji. I transferred into this school last week. No wonder you looked familiar last night, you came back to this school starting yesterday right?" he introduced himself. "Ahh, yes. That's why I've never seen you before… Sorry, I didn't really pay attention to any students in this class." that was a lie, I _did_ pay my attention to Ichigo just now. "Thanks for saving me last night."

"It's okay. Anyway, do you mind having lunch with me?"_ huh? He offered me to have lunch with him?_ "I… I don't mind." I smiled.

It was a really breezy morning, the autumn leaves on the shady trees waved at the eye of the heaven and the green grass swayed with the wind, causing my legs to feel prickly underneath my long skirt. As much as I felt so uncomfortable, I actually enjoyed it. I wonder, will I still alive when winter comes?

I placed my bento box on my lap and took out my not-so-beautiful kimchi. It was my second try, but I still could not make pretty kimchi. Damn it!

"Are you… Korean?" Renji asked. "Nope. A Korean patient taught me how to make kimchi." I answered. "Oh, I see…" it seemed like he wanted to further his question since I mentioned 'patient' just now, I bet he wanted to ask about hospital, but luckily he didn't.

"Do you want some?" I offered. "It's not beautiful but the taste is really wonderful. It's a little spicy though. Try it."

"Err, okay then." I could see his face turned bright red after eating it. "It's really tasty! Can I have some more?" he asked, joyfully. "Sure, why not?"

I felt so happy that he enjoyed my kimchi. I spent my lunch break happily with him. We chat about weird stuffs. Trees, sun, diamond, bicycle, how random. But for awhile, I forgot about Kaien. I forgot about my cruel dad. I forgot about wild beast Grimmjow. Renji really made me feel safe although he was still a stranger to me.

"Kuchiki –"

"Just call me Rukia." I said.

"Okay… ne Rukia, may I ask something?" I nodded. "Last night, why are you bleeding?" I took a moment to take a deep breath before answering it.

"I was… hit by a car I guess." I swore he choked on his drink right after I answered his question.

"AND YOU HAVE THE STRENGTH TO COME TO SCHOOL TODAY??!" he widened his eyes in disbelief. "I've used to it. I've tasted worse. Tee hee…" _stupid Rukia, what a lame answer!_

I wished we could talk for a little longer, but the bell rang so quickly. Therefore we rushed to our class and took our seat. Thank God he was located near me, although not as near as Ichigo and I. But I felt really secured, and somehow relieved.

* * *

"We're going to have Chemistry project and it has to be in pair." Mrs. Unohana stated at the end of her lesson. "Nooo~" most of the students complained, but some of them didn't even care about it. "This is important for your final exam. So stop complaining. It's for your own sake too."

"Awww…" the students sighed. Why were they so sad? I mean, it was just a Chemistry project.

"Abarai Renji, your pairing is… Kojima Mizuiro."

"Nice to meet you." Mizuiro greeted Renji. I felt slightly disappointed because I wasn't his partner. But I quickly pushed that feeling away.

"Hiroki Shinji will be paired up with Hiyori."

"You'll get lots of trouble, Hiyori." Shinji grinned at his childhood friend, Hiyori. "Shut up!" she crossed her arms over her chest with a pout on her lips.

"Toushiro?"

"Yes?"

"Karin will be your partner."

"Does Mrs. Unohana know that we're a couple?" he whispered to Karin. "I don't think so. Let's just pretend that this is fate." she winked.

"Inoue Orihime's partner is Ishida Uryuu while Kurosaki Ichigo will be paired up with Kuchiki Rukia." excuse me? Kurosaki Ichigo is my partner?? She's got to be kidding me. I hope there will be some changing, I want anyone but Inoue and that evil brat.

"Objection, I want Inoue. I don't want a brainless girl to be my partner 'cause I'm sure the project will be sucks since she has no brain at all." Ichigo said bluntly. I'm not sure whether I should be happy or sad. But I'm glad that he wanted to change, although the way he asked was too harsh.

"Yes, I should be with Kurosaki-kun. Why does Ishida has to be my partner? Eww!" Inoue shouted loudly, some girls were smirking and making faces at her.

"Perhaps because… we were meant to be together?" Ishida grinned sheepishly at her. "SHUT UP! This isn't funny idiot! Mrs. Unohana, can't you change the partner for us?" she frowned. "I'm afraid I can't Inoue, even your father can't do anything about it. You have to accept who your partner is."

Inoue was glaring at me coldly, I could see she was muttering some curse under her breath. It was not my fault– in fact, I don't even want to be paired up with Kurosaki Ichigo. I'm pretty sure he will treat me badly.

* * *

"When will we start our project?" I asked Ichigo as we walked together out of the classroom. I didn't even look at his eyes because I could feel that he was glaring at me. "Straight away, no need to go home." he said sternly. "Oh, okay. Your house… or my house?" I asked him politely but he replied me annoyingly. Like, ultra super duper annoyingly.

"Are you kidding me? Who the hell wants to go to your old shabby house?? Oh wait, I haven't seen your house yet, but I'm pretty sure that it is small, old, shabby, out of water supply, out of electric supply, you got termites everywhere, cockroaches everywhere even on your dining table– the place where you eat, geez, disgusting! The wall could not stand on itself, the ceiling had broken –"

"Stop criticizing my house when you haven't seen it yet!" I shouted, continued by soft sob. "Tch, are you crying? What an idiot! Seriously, go get a life." Did I hear it right? Idiot? Go get a life? God, why do I have to handle someone like him? I don't think Kurosaki Ichigo can be defined as human because he has no heart at all.

"You should get a life too." I spoke slowly. I could see he wanted to slap me but suddenly his limousine appeared. Hurriedly, he went inside the limo. I followed him, basically because he said there was no need to go home, so I assumed I'll ride the limo with him. But he made a weird facial expression when he saw me walking towards him.

"Aren't I… I mean, aren't we going to your home?" abruptly, he stepped out from the limo and raised an eyebrow at me.

"Do you think you deserve riding that luxurious limousine? Aw come on man! Take a look at yourself, you're nothing! No one, nobody! You deserve nothing but that shabby house of yours, okay? Just in case you lost, here." he threw his card away from his leather wallet. I didn't even move my legs, I was looking at where the card flew.

It went straight into the deep, smelly school's drain.

"What are you looking at??! Go pick it!!" he yelled.

I forced myself to pick up the card, it made my uniform wet and stink, but somehow– I didn't care anymore.

"My address is there, you can choose either to walk or take a cab, but I don't think you afford taking a cab, right? Commoners like you should ride a pig instead." he laughed maniacally. "B-but, it's raining…" I muttered. Then, he cupped my chin strongly so that I could look straight into his eyes,

"SO WHAT??! Like I care!!" he pushed me backward and I fell on the ground landing on my wrists that tried to support my body. Tears were accumulating behind my eyelids. However, he ignored me and stepped inside his limousine arrogantly. As quick as flash, I was left alone on the ground; only sounds of dropping rainwater accompanied my empty, hollow soul.

I felt like a stupid person. A very stupid person. Dumbass. Moron. Idiot. Imbecile. Nitwit. Daft. Retarded. Anything.

Without realising, I was crying, again, because of him. Why am I so stupid? I shouldn't cry, I shouldn't be like this, I should have slapped him when he insulted me.

But I couldn't. There was something inside him that fluttered my heart when he was around, although all he did was hurting me, I felt happy when he was around me. Crap, I _am_ retarded.

From the corner of my teary eyed; I could see there was someone beside me, holding an umbrella. Slowly, I looked up, it was…

* * *

PWAHAHAHAHA cliff hanger ;P

As the writer of this fic, I give you permission to kick Ichigo's ass :[


	5. Reunion really?::

I'm really sorry for the late update. You see, the desktop was broken. And too bad we only have laptops and the other desktop is available in December. So yeah, after transferring the files, I worked on this fic asap.

In case you're forgotten the plot, here's a sneak peek:

Rukia has HIV; her dad abused her; she has a crush on Ichigo; and she has a chemistry project with him; he left her alone in the rain after insulting her;;

_

* * *

From the corner of my teary eyed; I could see there was someone beside me, holding an umbrella. Slowly, I looked up, it was…_

**CHAPTER 04**

It was Ishida Uryuu.

"Here." He took out his hand. The weak smile carved on his thin lips assured me he saw everything. I stood up with his help.

Out of sudden a red Mercedes stopped in front of us. "Come in, I'll ask my driver to bring you to his house." He offered. I wanted to decline, but the rain was getting heavier; so I accepted his offer. He didn't seem to mind at all that my dress was still wet when I got into his car.

There was an awkward silence between us. I kept my gaze outside the window but I could sense that he was staring at me. He made me feel uncomfortable; I bit my lower lip to calm myself.

Out of the blue he took my hand and observed it. "What are you doing?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrows. "Shh. Your hand is injured, let me help you." He massaged my hand softly with his thick fingers. The uncomfortable feeling I had earlier rose up slightly. "That Kurosaki, he shouldn't have done this to you." I just remained silent and let him continued massaging my hand.

"Sir, we've arrived at Kurosaki-san's house." The driver told him.

I went out of the car and bowed at both Ishida and the driver.

"Be careful. I don't want you to get hurt by that ass-hole Kurosaki. But if you're really pissed off, make him piss too. You have to learn how to fight back with words sometimes."

"Thanks Ishida."

"Nothing much. Actually as I help you, I'm helping myself too. Bye." We waved each other goodbye as the car started moving. _Helping himself? To get that Inoue bitch? Haha_. I couldn't help but chuckled. _Wait, did I just call her bitch? But it suits her perfectly somehow..._

I turned my body around to face Kurosaki Ichigo's house. Should I call it mansion instead? It was extremely enormous.

_Be strong Rukia. You can do this. Stop being such a weak girl. And one more, don't cry no matter how harsh his words may be. Good luck!_

I stepped forward and pressed the bell button.

"Good evening. Who are you and who do you have business with?" I looked around but no one could be seen. _Where does that voice come from_? Anyway, I guess I had to answer it. "I'm Rukia and I have school work with Kurosaki Ichigo." _This_ _looks really stupid; I'm talking to a __bell button_. "Come in then." Suddenly the main door opened by itself so I entered the house.

As I stepped into it I had a very peculiar feeling. I've never been into this kind of house before. It kind of scared me because it seemed large but empty. But I just ignored the feeling and kept walking. There was a swimming pool located behind fountain, and beside it, a maze garden could be seen. I spotted three gardeners were busy trimming the plants. Wow.

Seconds later, an old woman dressed in a maid uniform greeted me.

"You must be Rukia; oh my, your cloth is pretty damp. Here, follow me. I'll get you clothes to change into." I wanted to decline but after looking at myself, I accepted her offer and changed into a yellow dress she gave me.

"Young master will come down soon. Please, have a seat first." I did as the old woman said. She served hot tea for me so I drank it. "Thank you. For the clothes and tea." I said slowly. "It's okay. Master always prepare some extra clothes to give to our guest permanently. So don't worry about it. Well, I have other works to do. Would you mind waiting for young master here?" I shook my head as my answer. Then, I was left alone.

I observed the interior of the house astoundingly. The wooden sofa I was seating on probably made of high-quality wood. Oak, I guess. The glorious thick and soft carpet under my feet was probably imported from another country. Iran, or maybe Turkey. I looked up; a baccarat birdcage chandelier was hanging on the ceiling. My knowledge about these stuffs was probably because I used to read magazines about house decorating while staying in the hospital. It was the first time I've seen the real thing. My, I could smell how expensive everything in this house was.

Soon, I saw Ichigo was descending downstairs. He was dressed in a tight black t-shirt that emphasized his chest with dark blue skinny jeans. His wet hair dripping onto the towel draped around his neck. Gosh, he looked hotter than usual. I bet he had just taken a shower.

"So you finally arrived. I thought you'll be dead in a car accident." There was a short pause before he pointed his finger at me. "That dress belongs to my dad right? You should be grateful that a filthy pig like you were given a dress." I gave him an ice glare; I wish I could slap him anytime. Now, to be honest.

"Stop glaring. You look fugly you know that? I want to finish my lunch first so you'll just wait for me at my room." With that, he left me alone. I gritted my teeth. Hard.

I was about to stand up but then a man in about forties or fifties greeted me. "Wow wow wow who is this pretty girl~?" The excited expression on his face totally changed to shock when he looked at my face properly. I wondered why though. He wore a maroon shirt and his tie was barely hung on the collar of his shirt.

"Kurosaki Isshin, Ichigo's old man. Nice to meet you." He took my hand and kissed it softly. "I'm…Kuchiki Rukia." _Is he really Ichigo's father? Their attitudes are… WAY different._

"Ichigo's friend is here?" A voice came out of nowhere. I averted my gaze behind Isshin and noticed a tan skinned woman approaching me.

"Nice to meet you! I'm-"

"Ignore her." A new guy, totally younger than Isshin suddenly stopped the woman from continuing her words. When he saw me, his expression was the same as Isshin, but he stared at me with wider eyes. He had long black hair and… _are those HAIRPINS on his hair?_

"Stop that, Byakuya-boy! I'm Yoruichi, Byakuya's-"

"She's nobody." The hairpin guy interrupted. Gosh, what is happening here?

"Ignore him girl, I'm his fiancé, Yoruichi. And he's Byakuya. Ichigo's big brother." She took out her hand and I shook it.

"Ahh… you guys look so cute together." I stated.

"I thought we look like a donkey together, right Yoruichi?" Wow. I believe that Byakuya is REALLY Kurosaki Ichigo's brother. Still, their attitudes were different than their dad. And it was weird that he treated his fiancé like that.

"Ah, too bad I have to go. Soifon asked me to accompany her shopping." Yoruichi picked up her handbag and was ready to leave the house. "Great. Finally I can have some freedom." Byakuya said. Oh my, I better go to Ichigo's room quickly.

"Geez you two. Stop it. We have guest here. Oh by the way Rukia-san, if you're looking for Ichigo's room, it's upstairs. The first door you meet." Ichigo's old man told me. "Thank you." I smiled.

"It's always my pleasure to help pretty girl like you." He gave me a thumb up and grinned happily._ For a billionaire_,_ he's really weird_.

* * *

I sat on the chair waiting for Ichigo. His room was so big on the first look. On the second look, I realized that his room was bigger than my whole house!

A picture of him and Inoue on the study desk intrigued me. Seeing them smiling happily in the picture somehow produced an uneasy feeling inside my stomach. In other word, jealous. Wait a minute, jealous? Oh come on, that was just not right. _Right?_

Just sitting and waiting was not my favorite hobby. Especially after staying in hospital for two months. So I decided to walk around and observed everything that he had in his room. It was a perfect room actually. Unlike my room which only had a single bed and a dusty tattered cupboard. I walked around again and stared at the big LED television in front of me. Damn rich bastard. They had everything. As I went back to the place where I started my 'journey', something caught my eyes; it was an old picture lying under the study chair. I bent down and picked up the picture.

I could feel my heart stopped beating, literally. I blinked multiple times to make sure my eyes weren't pranking on me.

It was an old picture of my family. Dad, mom, sis and me at a waterfall.

How could my family picture end up being in Ichigo's house? It was utterly inconceivable.

"What the hell are you doing?" Ichigo's sudden voice totally startled me I almost jumped out of my skin! "Nothing!" I said as I quickly hid the photo behind me. He gave me a 'like-I-would-buy-that' look, so I added, "Just… looking around. You know, your room is bigger than my whole house! Oh and, may I go to the washroom?" I smiled, a fake plus silly one.

"Yeah, but not the one in this room. I won't let any pig use my bathroom. Get out. Find it yourself."

"…" Hurriedly, I went out of his room. While clenching my fist tightly, of course.

Oh man, where should I go?

* * *

As I was wandering inside the big house, I could hear some nagging voice nearby which caught my attention.

"Stop it Byakuya-sama, I'm working right now." _Huh? Whose voice is that? Yoruichi-san just went shopping right?_

"I don't think it's wrong for me to hug you."_ Isn't that Byakuya's voice? _I peeked through the hole in the door where the voice came from.

I saw Byakuya was hugging a lady in a maid uniform. I couldn't see her face because she was burying her head into his chest. Wow, their relationship was kind of… close. Extremely close, I presumed.

"Okay that's it. Now let me sweep the floor." She broke the hug and reached for her broom, but then Byakuya held her waist and as quick as flash, he pressed a kiss on her lips. Gosh, Byakuya had an affair with his maid! This explains his behavior towards his fiancé just now. Geez. This family is weird. I better find washroom quickly before they spotted me.

After washing my face. I observed the picture once again. Unmistakably, it was the picture of my family. I smirked looking at my sister and I in that picture. We were surprisingly similar. Even before, people have always thought that we were twins because of the same eyes and hairstyles. Anyhow, it was still strange to me how the hell did our picture ended up inside Kurosaki Ichigo's room.

When I returned to his room, I could hear he was talking on the phone.

"What? You're at Ishida's house for the project? Jealous? NO WAY! You're overreacting, Inoue. Yeah yeah. Okay. Bye. Love ya." He ended his call with a wide grin on his face. I couldn't help but giggled looking at his face. He looked so funny grinning like that.

Anyway, I took the opportunity to ask him about the picture since he was in a very good mood.

"Ichigo, can I ask you something?" He automatically changed his expression into his usual scowl. But it was an approachable one, if you get what I mean.

"What is it?"

"Can I know how'd you get this picture? I found it… just now. In this room." I showed him the picture. He rose an eyebrow while seeing it.

"I don't know. Not mine. Not my family's too. Guess it belongs to _her_. Maybe she accidentally slipped it here while cleaning this room."

"Your maid? What's her name?" _Is she the one who was with Byakuya just now?_

"Don't ask something that you shouldn't know. Remember your place."

"Please, I need to know." I spoke seriously, emphasizing the 'need' word. I could hear a light sigh escaped from his mouth.

"I don't know her full name, but we call her Hisana. Now shut up. No more stupid questions."

I widened my eyes; it was hard to register his words properly into my brain without trembling myself.

Hisana… she had the same name as my sister who drowned herself into the sea 9 years ago.

I could still remember the reflection of sadness on her face.

Her sad face when mommy died.

Her sad face when she was abused by dad.

Her sad face before she left me. Forever.

**FLASHBACK**

"_Nee-san, where are you going?" I asked as I caught her trying to leave the house sneakily._

"_I j-just want to p-play at the beach for awhile R-Rukia…" She stuttered._

"_But why didn't you bring anything? You should have brought bucket to collect oysters' shells."_

"…_I don't need those things…"_

"_Can I go with you?" I pleaded._

"_NO! You have to stay here. Okay?" She said while hugging me tightly._

"_But please…" I held on to her tighter._

"_I'm sorry Rukia. I gotta go now." I could see small droplets of crystal tears formed in her misty eyes when she broke the hug._

"_When will you come home?" There was a deep pause between us._

"_Soon. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry." She smiled. A weak smile. And that was the last time I saw her._

"Oi pig!"

A male voice snapped my wandering mind back to reality.

"Geez, where do you put your mind, in your ass?"

"Shut up. Let's start our work." He widened his eyes, totally shocked by my response. Even I couldn't believe what I just muttered. But he just let it be. Lesson of the day: Ishida's advice really helps.

In about approximately 4 hours, we completed half of the project. I was awfully hungry, tired and sleepy.

"Hey, how do we solve this?" I repeated my question when I heard no response. I turned my gaze towards Ichigo and to my surprise, he was already asleep. He looked so peaceful. A total contrary to his conscious state. A sudden knocked on the door startled me.

"Young master, dinner's ready." From the sweet voice, I could tell that she was still pretty young. And her voice sounded familiar somehow…

"Can you please come in here? He's sleeping and I don't know how to wake him." I said, my eyes were still on Ichigo's sleeping face; observing, studying, and watching him.

"Oh, okay." Slowly, the door creaked open and before she stepped her feet into the room any further, I heard a loud gasp. I turned my gaze towards her direction and for once, my heart stopped beating for 5 seconds. Were my eyes kidding me?

There was no doubt. Her hair, her face, her eyes, everything.

Deep in my heart, I just knew she was still alive.

* * *

This chapter sucks a bit because after I've completely edit it and pressed the button save, IT SAYS "PLEASE LOG IN" WTF? I HAD TO EDIT EVERYTHING AGAIN! ARGHHH ! _

It seems Rukia had gotten a little stronger than previous chapters. I hope it's not too drastic . oh and sorry for too much italics in this chap haha.

Oh wells, if you have any questions then don't hesitate to ask. Please review. Actually the more the reviews the faster I'll update the next chapter since I'm on holiday right now lol xD


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